Another Blow

And yet another blow from the medical community.  As someone else said, trying to navigate the medical community is no job for a sick person.  After all the specialists that didn't understand or want to deal with me, after the affidavits for the insurance companies, I thought I was back in safe territory.  I thought I was okay for a while.  But no.  

My handicapped placard expired and I had to send in papers to get a new one which meant getting the doctor to fill out the paperwork.  Silly me.  I left it blank instead of filling it out for him and just having him sign it.  What did he do?  Said that I needed a competency driving test.  

Yup.  That's right.  I'm in the middle of a crash where I've been canceling most of my appointments. I've also been driving less than normal.  However, I've discovered that it is less stressful if I drive myself to my local appointments than using the Ride (handicapped van service) but now my license is going to be revoked unless I show up at some distant office and take a road test.

Oh the joy.  So here are some of the hurdles my doctor has just flung in my path:

• I have to read the driver's manual since it has been 35 years since I did a road test and the rules have changed.  
• Did I mention that I have trouble reading and memorizing information???  The MA driver's manual is 168 pages long and I have to memorize it.
• I have to practice driving since I haven't done it much this past year and I never could parallel park even when I was healthy.
• I have to find a car/rent a car that has an emergency brake in the center console of the car so the guy testing me can use it if I screw up (they seem to think the ebrake will actually stop the car: dumbassses).  Yes my state no longer provides cars to take a road test in and unless my car meets their standards I can't take the test.  I drive an American car which has the ebrake on the floor, well out of reach of the passenger.
• I have to pay for the car rental, the test and possibly license replacement (if my license expires prior to working this all out I have to pay for the new one).  If I fail the test or surrender my license I might have to pay for the full driver's ed before getting my license back.  This is over $1000 plus testing fees.
• I have to make an appointment months in advance and hope to God that I'm going to be well enough on the day of the test that I can drive.  If I'm not crashed I might be able to boost this by having caffeine and sugar prior to the test and just suffer the consequences later.
• I have to find someone to drive me to my road test in the rented car.  Which also means I have to pay for two drivers on the rental agreement.  Which also means my son can't be my driver since he is under 21.
• I'm guessing that i'm going to have to surrender my licence in the meantime.  SUCK ASS!!
• This means I'm going to have to go back to using the Ride or drive illegally and hope I don't get caught or in an accident.

So I'm angry.  This all sucks pond scum.  And yes I'm ranting.

However, I do have to wonder if loosing my license might not be a bad thing.  If the state decides that I'm medically unable to drive the insurance company can't turn around and claim their is nothing wrong with me.  As much as this sucks, as much as it inconveniences me, surrendering my license might be an advantage when my review comes up next winter.  So the real question is do I surrender it willingly or do I attempt the test and see what happens.