Why?

This post isn't about what you expect.  It isn't asking the question why am I sick?  It is asking the question why do people behave the way they do?  I'm not a people person.  I'm a registered, off the scale, Myers-Briggs official extreme introvert so people often do things that baffle me.  I just don't get it.

I am starting to reach the breaking point of one of the few friendships I have managed to maintain.  This is what happened.  She emailed me wondering if we could get together for movie night this Saturday or next.  This is something I've done with lots of success with other friends.  It is low key.  I don't have to talk much or do much.  We sit and watch a movie together on my big screen TV and then chat over coffee afterwards.  It is an easy and fun way of entertaining.  So I email her back that this Saturday at 8pm would be perfect.  I also put in a cautionary note that if I'm not feeling well I might have to cancel at the last minute since I don't know on a day to day basis if I'm going to be okay or not.  Days later I get this email back that she is now going canoeing that day and doesn't know if she'll be back by 8pm to come over my house for the movie.  Can we get together the following weekend?  That's a no.  If I'm doing ok I'm attempting to go to a wedding.  Of course the following two or more weeks aren't good for her since she has other plans.  I tell her to contact me when she gets back from traveling so I don't expect to hear from her for months if ever again.

Here is a bit of background.  She loves talking.  She knows best.  She eats dinner at 8 or 9pm.  She doesn't have kids.  She stays up late at night and gets up late in the morning.  She is afraid of aging and hates hanging around "old" people even though she is already in her 50's.  She is busy busy busy and fills her days up with lots of stuff to do.  In order to get together in the past I've had to book it literally months in advance.  We had booked a movie night months ago but I had to cancel after a TB test made me crash hard and I was bedridden with a fever.  I couldn't even talk because my throat hurt so much.  Hubby had to call her to cancel.  I got an email the next day from her that she had managed to rescue her plans and found something else to do.  She never asked me how I was doing.  Thanks for caring.

I keep running over this week's events in my head.  Why ask someone to get together and then say it is inconvenient for you?  Why ask someone who is major league ill to hang out and then dictate the time and place to them because you eat dinner at 8pm even though the rest of the local universe eats around 6pm?  Why get all snitty with someone who is very ill had to cancel on you?  Why would you go months without asking how they are even though we are supposed to be friends?  What is wrong with this woman?  Can't deal with aging?  Can't deal with people getting sick?  Is she trying to avoid her own mortality?  She certainly has hamfisted control over her little world she has created for herself.  She runs her own business and has a milquetoast for a husband (whom I love dearly BTW he is such a nice person).  Every thing is tightly under her control.  I think I'm done with her.  I'm going to set the rules from now on.  I'm the one who is ill and needs to set the timetable and location and the content of our get togethers.  If she doesn't like it tough noogies.  Go find someone else to boss around.  I'm very angry about being treated this way.